Thursday Afternoon, March 26, 2009

Hi Everyone:

It's time for an Allie update. Well, we have gotten past the latest accident and have moved on to greener pastures. Allie is amazing and getting better everyday. Brain injuries are wierd but she is still growing everyday. Before where she was resisting growth and change she is now embracing it. I guess it time but I have been there before. In my mind I see her coming into the house one day and just telling us it is time to go and feeling comfortable because she has grown and recovered to her fullest potential. Proud and sad at the same time because for all of the crap and disappointment and frustration and not knowing that comes with a TBI, there is still that bond that you create, I will probably fall apart more on that day then even before but I see it in my head just as I see dancing at her wedding and attending her college graduation.

So how is this for no coincidences. After Allie's last accident, I was at my office on a Tuesday, (I am never in on Tuesdays). I was pretty much out of my mind and looking for help. I needed to find more therapy for Allie but when you are a high functioning TBI, you are forgotten, there is no help for you. The hospital case workers never follow up and if you are not educated and motivated - you are lost - God help all of those; we call then the walking wounded. On the outside they look OK but on the inside, things are not so good.

Well as life would have it the phone rand and it was an MD friend of mine (yes I have one) who called to discuss a mutual patient. He is also very familiar with Allie and her case. I told him that I needed to do something, wether it was send Allie to a school or hospital or something ( you don't know what or where because the doctors or neurologists don't tell you anything. This is not complaining but the truth for so many). He suggested I look into the Pisgah Institute and since I had never heard of it I looked it up on the internet and saw they were doing something called neurofeedback and were getting great results. Well I called them and spoke to some of the doctors and then started researching neurofeedbcak on line and saw there was a training seminar starting the next day in Atlanta with some of the pioneersin the field (Sigfried and Sue Othmer). Then I spoke with a psycologist in Asheville who had worked successfully with brain injuries and autism, so I was off to Atlanta. The training was great and I noticed immediate results on myself so we purchased the equipment and are now training at home. Allie has had five sessions to date and seems to have lost that far away look in her eyes and just seems more grown up and appropriate. I can't wait to see how it goes after 20 visits and 100 visits. I'll keep you filled in.

Also, Allie stated working at an assisted living facility this week. She is helping serve meals and is working with the activities counselor. I just love it that she is there. The people know her story and have embraced her. She is finishing up her second semester at college (she took two classes this time around) and we are thrilled. It's hard but getting better every day.

We want to give hope to everyone out there. If not today, tomorrow or the next day or the next day. We know what many of you are going through butonly to the extent that we have experienced it. This Saturday we will be doing a walk with the local brain injury association and Allie wants to walk for the Relay for Life. I have been taking her to lunch at an organic restaurant most days and she is starting to like it - hopefully it will be a new way of eating for all of us.

I just want everyone to know that you prayers are what have carried us. We think of you all each and every day. We ask that you continue to pray for Allie and for our good friends Paige Cook and Rachael Juliano.

Full Recovery - Never a Doubt
With Love,
Allie's Dad

Tuesday Morning, March 3, 2009

Just when you think you have have it made, a brain injury tells you different. Wow! I sure wish there was a TBI manual to help you see where you are on the road to full recovery.

Allie totalled out her car on Saturday - she is OK. She was driving on the same road as her first accident only about twelve mile in the other direction when she hydroplaned around a curve, spun out and hit a vehicle parked on the other side of the road. She was shook up - I was pissed. At first your emotions are how the hell could you be so careless, then you realize how this cahnges things again, then you are angry for a few days and then you look in her eyes and try to understand her emotionless responses and you see the injury still buried deep inside of her and you think about how bad you suck to have gotten angry.

Although she is up and functioning, the injury is so real and so fresh and you understand so little and then you wonder, what else can I do or what should I have been doing all along? Allie is among the walking wounded. She is a high functioning brain injury and that places her as one of the lost children. To high functioning for a rehab facility or school but not functioning well enough to have her own place or a job or the ability to take care of herself.

The worst part is the continual breaking of our hearts. We need help for her but it is not available - yet. We will find it and she will continue to grow and we will continue to love her and get stronger.

An exasperated - damn.

Allie's Dad - Full Recovery - Never a Doubt; This too shall pass; God's delay is not God's denial