November 24th 2010

Good morning everyone

well it's almost Thanksgiving and everyone in my family has a lot to be thankful for again this year. 2010 has brought with it many ups and downs but thankfully more ups and downs. It's been a year of growth and continued blessings  as we all continue to grow towards full recovery.

Allie continues to grow and makes great strides. As for me, will I have been the lot of personal growth also as I have struggled with some of the decisions I have made with regards to Allie's therapies and whether or not I was doing the right things-it turns out that I was. It is difficult for us to know as parents if we are doing the right things for our children and if we have never had teenagers before, to know what his teenage behavior and what is brain injury behavior. Perplexing.

Allie is working with a life coach who has helped her set goals and has assisted her in her home with many of the organizational skills which you and I take for granted.Some of the best news for this holiday season is that Allie has been cast in a play (after many auditions and many rejections) and she is once again blossoming and growing now that she's back in her element. Thank you Al for giving her a chance when so many have not. It is a Christmas play and that is sort of significant because she truly is a miracle.

There's been a lot of interesting growth in Allie recently and she is becoming much more proactive in all aspects of her life. It is really cool to see how she is now handling adult decisions and making the right choices (at least as far as I can see as much if she lets me know). A few months back I made a questionnaire for Allie regarding how she feels (lonely, abandoned, happy, frustrated) and for the first time I got a very honest insight into what is going on in her mind in which she is going through and for as frustrating as it can be for me at times, it is much more frustrating for her but she's just so happy and so okay with everything that I cannot help but be happy and okay with her.

I guess one of the biggest things I've learned this year is to accept Allie for who she is and how she looks today and to love unconditionally no matter why. Believe me, when you have a brain injured child you have a tendency to view them as how they were before the accident( if it is a traumatic brain injury) and knowing the potential she had before the injury and with my never-ending mindset and perseverance towards full recovery, sometimes you can push a little bit hard-maybe too hard at times. But in the end, if it's done with love, then even if the bad times are good.

It's kind of like trying to open up a rusty gate. In the beginning, when you first push on it, it doesn't budge and even pushes back at you to return to its starting point. But if you keep pushing gently and adding oil (love) you'll eventually be able to get the gate open and functioning again.

So as we approach another Thanksgiving, let me just give thanks for all of you who prayed for Allie and have helped create this massive change in her life through your love and caring.

God bless you all,
Allie's dad