Last Tuesday in April, 2009

A true day of gratitude. Every now and then, Allie and I decide to go visit the nurses and doctors at Greenville Memorial Hospital. It is not only a reminder to us of how far we have come but also serves to let the docotrs and nurses see that their good work does produce great results (sometimes, not every thing or nothing is in our control) and it also helps some of the people we meet along the way in there; people who are suffering on their own and are given a glimpse of hope and possibility by her presence. Today I think I went mostly for me and may just be the last time we make this trip. We will still seek to inspire but I no longer think I need the (in some wierd way) comfort of being there. When you are somewhere for so long it becomes comfortable there and almost feel safe in some strange way. I personally feel free and safe and on the road to full recovery myself along with every member of my family. I no longer think that Allie will ever need their services again and that life is really going to be okay.

It was inspiring at the hospital today. Not only inspiring but validating and in many ways the validation came from being recognized by many of the nurses and doctors for the control we had at the hospital and for the way we handled our daughters recovery. It is not that validation is needed but it feels very good. It makes you just look at each other and allows you to nod in silence together. We make the connection that we did do our job to the best of our abilities and with God, prayer, the nurses and doctors, her brother Matt and his wise guidance, we, in some way, did make a difference in her recovery and will continue to.

The nurses in the ICU were so excited to see Allie and they clamoured around her and peppered her with questions about what she is doing and how school was going and when she dyed her hair red (yesterday) and she handled all of their questions very well. The ICU shook her up this time and hit her emotionally especially when she saw a guy with a fresh amputation of his leg, no dressing on just fresh healing. I did have to explain to her and with no disrespect to anyone that he was fortunate to be alive and that many people live active and fulfillinf lives with artificial limbs. She wasn't fully convinced but we moved on to the Rehab Center and saw her doctor there who was quite amazed by her and they chatted for 10 minutes or so. The rest was a lot of the same but the emotional ties are fading. NOw we have been here before but this time I believe we have crossed a hurdle that we never have to go back over.

You know, a lot of this was also to show them, to prove to them that she would make a full recovery let them know that if they would open their eyes and make a better attempt or take a different approach that they may have different outcomes. To almost sat FU, damn it, you were ready to give up on her but we were not! There, I said it. FU we will not give up them and we will not give up ever. Don't know where all that came from but it sure is what I was feeling. I guess the trip today stirred up a lot of the bad crap also but reingited out fire, our gratitude and our love of God. Thank you for this journey. I know it's not over but I now look forward to the rest.

As crazy as it may sound to many but today I was told that it is time that we all move on with our lives. I like the sound of that.

Before I go and I am sure I will always be back, let me tell you that I had the chance to hear Allie siong with her new instructor Kate this morning and I was floored. I have been told by two people that her pitch was perfect and that she is singing as well if not better than before the accident.

In gratitude, now and always
Allie's Dad

PS please pray for our friends Paige Cook and Rachel Juliano and please pass all of their names on to your prayer groups. Allie Cagen, Paige Cook, Rachel Juliano and all of their families. God Bless