Well if I can be perfectly honest, right now at this very moment - life sucks. Day in and day out, moment to moment you just have the highest of hopes and a heart full of love ready for that great moment or even a calm moment to come and you are greeted with meanness which is now loud and sometimes using curse words now. It just breaks your heart and drains your spirit and we know it's not Allie but still the same the hurt is real. It's not even the hurt it's just the fact that she has absolutely no understanding of what happened, why she is in the hospital and even the fact that she is being mean and tomorrow they what to have a meeting to discuss discharge plans (yikes).

At different times during the day, this blog can take on different tones, a few minutes ago Nancy was really upset and justifiably so. After 65 days you just want your life back at least some sense of normaly, everything starts to suffer.

It's so interesting, I have been trying to do this blog for the last forty minutes but people we have become friends with in the hospital keep coming by and they alk to you and cheer you up - that's what keeps you going, no I am ready to go upstairs again. Also, Stan the head administrator for the rehab just stopped by and he is so pro Allie it is incredible. He is doing everything to make things happen for her.

I try to share real feelings with you only so you don't think that everything is rosey and hunky dorey all of the time because it isn't. We are still full of hope and know that Full Recovery is only around the corner. Allie IS doing great and to look at her and speak to her you may never think that anything is wrong. We are truly at a cross road and as the people we are and with the beliefs we have we usually take the road less traveled and that has always worked for us. We are NOT going to drug her into submission, we are going to pray and work with her and get and give the best we can for her. She is and always has been a brilliant child and her light continues to shine but for as brilliant as she is she is just as difficult and in this condition she is the same, so we will love her lots and lots.

Nancy is talking to Allie on the cell phone right now. When she kicks us out we go and sit in the lobby and wait, then we call her and ask if she wants us to come back. Right now she does so for all of my friends out there in Allie land - Good Night and Gid Bless.

Allie's Dad

PS - The other day I put in the blog that Ful Recovery needed a logo of a Roller Coaster with a Guardian Angel on the front of it and our good friend Pam from Brevard Printing sent one to us, see side panel. Good Night